Category Archives: The First Essential Scary Truth

Resistance Is Futile

Killing Jimmy Hoffa

5 Bands/Artists I Don’t Need or Want to Hear Anymore

The Worst Lyrics Ever?

An LA Panic Attack By Guest Blogger Nathan Wellman

Free Foxy Cuda!

In The Year 1294

The Secret Of The Jews Immortality

What The Hell Were They Thinking By Guest Blogger Kiko Jones

NFL Replacement Refs: Blaming The Victim

#Eastwooding – It’s Not What You Think By Guest Blogger Liz Georges

Dave Mustaine Hates Obama On Foreign Soil

Committing Adultery On G-d

Incinerating Chivalry

A Public Service Announcement From Guest Blogger Liz Georges

The Method Kills

Killed By The C.I.A. With Deli Meat

Michigan Man Burns The Jersey State Flag And John Basilone Smiles

The 2nd Worst Drug Dealer In America

Health Fascists Take Over Voyuerism

The Detroit Media Is Lazy On Alan Trammell

The Celebrity Copycat

Proselytizing Atheists

Fluoride Tattoos And Teeth

The Inevitable Codicil To Murphy’s Law

Lou Reed’s LuLu Calms The Savage Corgi

Sarkozy Joins The Resistance

Ride The Backlash: Guest Blogger Kiko Jones Reviews Lou Reed and Metallica’s Lulu

Back To The Future With Private Mortgage Lending

Goodbye To My Ray’s Pizza

Bob Turner Loves The Jews

Jerry Della Femina And The 1993 World Trade Center Bombing

But It’s Cash

Debt On The Retail Plan Or Why Jews Don’t Run The Country

Is There A Green Leaf On My Teeth

No MillerCoors Beer In Minnesota

The Health Nazi’s Are In My Home

Beware: The Federal Government Has Decided To Help Detroit

Delta And Saudi Arabian Airlines Partner Up And Everyone Freaks Out

A Guide For Canadians On How To Stage A Proper Riot

Killing Charlotte On The Cheap Redux

Weiner and Breitbart Make Monday Fun

Preparation B – Comment By Zola System Reader SGZ

Is Bloomberg To Blame?

Neo Nazi Shot By Son

Schutzhund Part 1 – A Guest Blog From Janethegreat

Meeting Iggy Pop

The Shylock Business – My Fallback Position

Midgets and Guns Redux

Almost There

They Aren’t Locking Their Doors In Brooklyn Heights

Stop Me If You’ve Heard This Before By Guest Blogger The Loser

The End Of The 40 Year Old Bartender Redux

Charlie Sheen To Play George S. Patton Jr.?

A Thong For San Gennaro

We’re Here For You

What’s A G-String?

Is The Beverage Cart Still In Play?

Chili’s Bar And Grill Wants You Dead

Regress And The Rabbit Redux

15 Guitar Player In 15 Minutes From Guest Blogger Liz Emrich

The Mars Bar Saved Me From Jury Duty

Matt Millen, I Challenge You To A Duel

35 Years Ago…

New Airport Scanners

The Soda Pop Wars – From Guest Blogger Sreeny Cherukuri

The Che Guevara of Bartending

…Had The Balls To Say It

Germany Ends Multiculturalism. The French Are Nervous.

Tiki Barber and Agent Penis – From CelebrityNameDroppers.Com

New Song Titles For The Baby Boomers

15 Albums In 15 Minutes – From Guest Blogger LeAndrew Taylor

15 Songs In 15 Minutes By Guest Blogger The Legendary Dennis “Machine Gun” Thompson

My Favorite 15 Albums In 15 Minutes – By Guest Blogger Liz Emrich

Tinted Windows, Sex Toys and Traffic Stops

The People’s Republic of Arizona?

My Favorite 15 Albums (This Week) In 15 Minutes

Killing Charlotte On The Cheap

Murder in the Service Industry

A Random Thought For A Sunday Afternoon

Happy 234 USA!

Just Like Cockroaches and Twinkies

Injecting Greatness Gets You the Chicks

The Tragically Hip Invent Guerilla Theatre

Denise Allard and DTE Can Save Us From Global Warming!

Did Reagan Plagiarize the Old Man?

Knocking Up A Martini

Busted!

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

Zola System Readers Top 3 Truly Terrible Drinks

9 Truly Terrible Things To Drink – By Guest Blogger janethegreat

Junkiedom Will Be Served

Mark McGwire Was Just Following Orders

My Top 10 Bars/Clubs In NYC That Are Lost To The Ages

Topic of Discussion

I Am A Quantum Criminal

Getting Back At The Man – Sorta

Is the Babysitter Finally Unmasked?

The Proper Way To Place A Bet

I Blame Lou Reed

It’s Back…………………

Stealing Signs – So What?

The Zola System Needs Some Love

I Am An Asshole

New York’s Online Poker Clubs

A Brief History of Snarky Redux

Her Booty Call, Not His

Busted With Green Phlegm On Black Pants

Fascism In The Bathroom

The Dumpling Breaks Her Jaw

Fucking Up in Reverse

Thoughts About Detroit

Midgets and Guns

Why I Didn’t Catch On With the Mets

The Death of Rock and Roll, Again

Left to Die in DC

Break-up and Murder Brought to You by Facebook

The Sarge Runs The Coup

Rats

41 Mojitos

Say Nice Things About Detroit

The Telescope is 400 Years Old

Downers Hit New Yorkers

The Vindication of Spiro T. Agnew

Kissing Lots of Frogs

In Search of the Proper Manhattan

A Message to His Friends

A Stay of Execution – from Guest Blogger Brian James

Now I Get It

Shoddy Construction and the Average New Yorker

A Rumble in Times Square

The End of the New York Tabloids?

There Are Such Things As Stupid Questions

Darwin Leaves New York

The Definition of Insanity

Who Do We Notice? From Guest Blogger janethegrt

Grooming Standards

Where Is A Buddhist Monk When You Need One?

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

Kwame Kilpatrick – The Worst Mayor In America Goes To Jail – FINALLY

Once Upon a Time In 1976 – By Guest Blogger ElGringo

Regress and the Rabbit

A Brief History of Snarky