Break Out The Kryptonite Lex Luthor

The Second Essential Scary Truth

At first I heard the whispers, rumors really, a gnat buzz in the wind, barely of Internet/Page Six quality.  Soon it came up to word on the street status, then to are you sure I’m no having an acid flash back heights and finally to cold hard, hungover truth.

Daily Planet reporter Clark Kent from Smallville, Superman, the Son of Jorel from the planet Kypton, has renounced his US citizenship.  This may not have received a lot of press on Fox, MSNBC and HBO or even in Iowa but it is a nasty knock to those of us who grew up on his exploits and had to sit through Christopher Reeve flying around in those rather fey PJ’s in the 70’s and 80’s.

At first, I thought it was some sort of ploy to get the illegal immigrants out of the country.  Superman is the most famous illegal immigrant the country has ever known and I thought the G was trying to get to the illegals sub-consciously.  If the US isn’t good enough for Superman, it isn’t good enough for you.

However that isn’t the reason.  It seems Truth, Justice and the American way aren’t enough for the Man of Steel anymore.  He is sick of being an instrument of foreign policy for the United States government, especially, the rumors hold, when it comes to our policy on Iran.  (Quick note: if we actually have a policy when it comes to the mad Mullahs and their Adolph Hitler wanna-be please e-mail me and let me in on the secret.)

And so, Superman is ditching his adopted country in it’s time of need to go to work for the same body that regularly hosts anti-Semetic conferences in Durban, South Africa and puts Syria on it’s Human Right Commission.  The New York Post called the man in the red, white and blue PJ’s an ingrate.  I would opt for traitor.

Note to Lex Luthor: it’s time to do your Wyatt Earp impersonation and be deputized as a US Marshall.  Then break out the Kryptonite boy; it’s time to have yourself a little party.  I knew there was a reason why I rooted Gene Hackman back in 1978.  Jesus, the next thing you know, Yoda will really have been Sith all along.