Charlie Brown Specials I’d Like To See

How Drunk Do You Have To Be To Get The Joke

A few years ago, Charlie Brown and the Peanuts gang made a new friend who developed leukemia in an animated special entitled, “Why, Charlie Brown, Why?”

Recently, MetLife has put out a series of instructional pamphlets which feature the Peanuts gang dealing with such issues as the loss of a loved one, writing a will, and dealing with a permanent disability. Now that Charlie Brown is dealing with important issues, how about some Peanuts specials for the kids of the 90s?

We could learn about V.D. in,
“It Burns When I Pee, Charlie Brown.”

Chuck and the Little Red-Headed Girl find out about unwanted pregnancy in,
“It’s Blue, Charlie Brown!”

Is Linus gay? Find out in,
“It’s a Different Kind of Love, Charlie Brown.”

Explore the real problems of child abuse in America in,
“You Made Me Do That, Charlie Brown.”

See how the Peanuts gang deals with date rape in,
“ ‘No’ Means ‘No,’ Charlie Brown.”

Discover a father’s forbidden love in,
“It’s Our Little Secret, Charlie Brown.”

The Peanuts gang gets a lesson in Ebonics in,
“Imo Busta Cap Inyo Ass, Charlie Brown.”

What goes on in the mind of a serial killer? Discover the inner workings of Pig Pen’s twisted psyche and meet his murderous alter ego, Mr. Clean in,
“God Told Me to Do It, Charlie Brown.”

Charlie Brown peddles his body for crack money while stealing Social Security checks and boosting automobiles in
“Go Blame Society, Charlie Brown.”

Or you can just come see Absolutely Filthy at Sacred Fools Theater January 25-March 2, 2013 at 8pm.

(Hat Tip: Jim’s Joke Depository)